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How to find a relationship at an older age

Relationship advice  Senior dating

Finding love at an older age can seem daunting and overwhelming. As a mature individual, you may find that others in your age group have not yet reached your maturity level, or may be interested in the younger dating pool. The obstacles of dating do not become any less difficult as you age, and it is important to focus on the only factor you can control– yourself.

You have hopefully become more established and confident in most aspects of your life, which should give you a strong foundation in looking for a relationship. If your stability is off kilter–maybe you are going through a recent divorce, or a bout of depression–dating is something you’ll need to ease into. No matter what place you’re at in life, you’ll want to be sure you’re willing and able to make the commitment, and put genuine time and effort into your dating life. Where to look? The places you will find relationship worthy singles will depend on where you’re at in life, and what type of relationship you’re looking for.

Online dating sites

If you’re timid about dating or recently back in the dating game, online dating sites can give you the tools and confidence to get out there and explore your options in a safe and efficient way. Furthermore, these sites come in all shapes and sizes to suit specific types of people or relationships. The following are just a few examples of available dating sites to help narrow your search.


If you’re over 50 and you don’t want to waste your time browsing younger singles and you’re specifically looking for a relationship with a person closer to your age, OurTime.com is the site for you. This site specifically weeds out anyone younger than 50 so you don’t have to don’t have to do the weeding yourself. The signup process is quick, easy, and straight to the point with only the basics to answer. The features of the site are just as straightforward and do not detract from the main goal: to meet and connect with potential partners. Visit »

If you’re looking to find other singles in your age range, education and experience level, EliteSingles is an excellent site to get started with. This site is marketed toward an older and more distinguished clientele: it boasts a high achieving and more mature membership base with 90% of subscribers over 30 years of age and 80% with a university degree. Visit Elitesingles.com »

If you are open to a connection with a variety of individuals, and/or you’re new to the online dating game, a more broadly focused site like Match.com may be more apt. Match.com has multiple features which allow you to connect with local singles in fun and interesting ways. Match Events gather other subscribers in events like mixers, karaoke nights, etc. organized by Match.com users in your local area. If you are weary about meeting with a match for the first time, you can attend a Match Event together and to get to know each other in a group setting before committing to a one-on-one date. Visit Match.com »

This site is specifically geared toward connecting attractive single women and successful older men. Sugardaddie.com may be ideal for older men seeking younger women who can give them a new and fresh dating experience. Or men who are looking for women who can keep up with their busy social and networking life-- which a successful career often requires. If you’re an attractive older woman looking to network, and you don’t mind the idea of a successful man’s arm candy, Sugardaddie.com may also be the right fit for you. Visit »

If you are retired and have the extra time to fill with as many engaging activities as you desire, taking classes is a great way to get out and meet other singles. Local colleges or universities often offer affordable classes over 6 to 9 week periods. This gives you the opportunity to not only better yourself and make valuable use of your time, but also to connect with others you can be sure you share at least a few interests with. The 6 to 9-week period is also an ideal amount of time to get to know someone: there just the right amount of time to develop a relationship thoughtfully, while also an expiration date which gives you the motivation to make a move before the quarter is over. And furthermore, if things don’t work out, you’ll probably never have to see them again once the class is over with.

Quieter bars
Don’t waste your time going to loud, expensive clubs that tend to be overrun by younger or immature members of the hook-up culture. Really take the time to find places that have a nice ambiance and attract a more mature and cultured crowd. Wine bars, jazz clubs, and whiskey lounges are just some places that tend to be better suited for a mature crowd. Try going out on a work night–single men without wives or girlfriends waiting for them at home are more likely to be out. Choose a place you can be your best self; a place where you are inclined to look nice and put on your best charms–not just to blow off steam.

Community work
Invest your time in volunteering or attending charity events in your community. This is a great way to meet singles that are stable enough in their own lives to be helping others. Committing your time this way will not only help better your community in fun and engaging ways, but will also connect you with other members of the community who are dedicated, caring, and hardworking people– which make for solid relationship-material.

How to be

The key to dating success at any age is to become stable on your own before putting yourself out there and exposing yourself to new experiences.

You should never use a relationship as a handle to pull yourself out of a slump or to make your life better. Instead, make sure you start as a complete person that can make yourself happy and mutually contribute to a relationship. Dating at an older age means you have more experiences under your belt, and your potential partners will too. This means it is essential you are secure in dealing with baggage that may come along with relationships.

Confidence is paramount in finding a relationship. You must have confidence and love for yourself to have confidence and love in a relationship. Having a strong foundation within yourself will keep you from taking dating too seriously or overthinking situations, and it will ultimately make it easier to recover from potentially failed relationships along the way.

You also must be willing to do the work a healthy relationship requires. Relationships don’t become any easier as you get older, and you must have the energy to spend if you choose to start one. If you don’t, you are doing a disservice to yourself, the other person and your potential relationship together.


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